Mood: PensiveMusic: Hillsong - Devotion
Listening to Devotion, the 2010 CF Camp theme song. Has it really been that long since I updated? Yeah, it probably have been. So many things have happened, I always get too lazy to update, but then I realise, I do actually want to read through about what has happened in my life and see how much I've changed, and document important things.
So first up, change of environment. I am now studying at Nanyang Polytechnic. As much as I do not like that school, it's the only PLACE in singapore that even teaches Occupation Therapy. So how's that for choice. The course is much harder than expected...but then again, I am ten times lazier than I expected myself to be. HAHAHA. But I love my classmates, I really do. I feel infinitely more at home than I did with my jc class. In sa5 I do have my own share of good friends, but I never felt like I really...belonged. After school, most of my friends were outside class. Even my classmates, they felt more like after school friends. I wouldn't talk to them during class. It was either that I kept to myself and talked to others outside class, or texted them. That's how much I hated talking in class. And also because (I don't care about saying such awful things because it's true and even if my ex-classmates chance upon this they deserve to know the shit they put me through for two entire years) they gossip like mad. Sometimes I talk and I feel eyes and ears in my direction. Yes, it's so obvious I could feel it. Or the way they would talk to me? They would ask questions to get answers from me just so that they have more stuff to gossip about me. Totally biased and untrue? I think not.
In any case, my new class is really awesome. I stay really far from everyone so that's kinda sucky. I stay really far from school, which is even worse. But thank God for smartphones and whatsapp so we even keep in touch after school! We plan birthdays, talk about our day, help each other at work, and even have twitter conversations at night hoho.
It's so hard to keep in touch with so many people...sometimes I feel really guilty about not talking to my other friends, friends I genuinely miss. But. We all have 'x' amount of love and effort inside of us. I don't think my 'x' level is very high. They say "make new friends but keep the old, one is silver the other is gold", but it's so hard. You can't live in the past, but neither can you treat friends like disposables. There needs to be a balance and I guess I've yet to find mine. I really admire people who can make a ton of friends and still keep all of them, and yet still have time for themselves, family, studies/jobs etc.
On to happier news, I want to officially introduce someone to this page:
His name is Jing Jie and while sometimes he makes me sad, he also makes me happy a lot of times, and does many many things for me! Might not see too much of him on this page though, maybe only snippets, because I'm generally quite shy and don't like to blog that much about my love life.
But till then,
Love.